Like Dorothy, who mused to her dust-mop-like mutt: "this isn't Kansas anymore, Toto!" - I realized that our kids were definitely not in the public school system anymore when my daughter posed a question:
"Are we Predestination or Free Will?"
She posed the question to me after intercepting a call to her mother's cell phone.
A few years back, I think I could have given my daughter - who incidentally just became a teenager last week - a very good answer to that question. However, I am fifty years old and I find that I am less sure of anything these days.
I was reared in a free-will theology, a great deal of my grandfather's preaching centered on the free-moral agency of man. But, he was also a throw-back from the older era of Wesleyan circuit riders, in which it was not uncommon for the audience of a differing theological persuasion than the preacher. He didn't seem to mind speaking to groups that might buck some of his doctrinal notions.
One of the few sermons that I remember him preaching was from the 6th chapter of the book of Esther: "On that night could not the king sleep...". As he worked through the story of Esther that night in the small church in LaFayette, Georgia, he stopped the sermon and announced that if anyone there was of the Predestination persuasion they were welcome at that point to dismiss themselves.
It was a joke, but the handful of people in that little church just sat there in stunned silence. In his long history of preaching to non-traditional crowds Grand-dad had often ministered to groups that were well-decided about the origins of their faith. In this case, he was about to agree with the predestination folks as he explained how God neatly brought all of the loose ends of that story into a neat knot.
I recorded that sermon and listened to it many times through the years. The book of Esther became one of my favorites. I really think that that sermon had a strong influence on my thinking, causing me to develop a deep appreciation for the sovereignty of God.
That deeply held awareness of the sovereignty of God over every situation was one of the things that drew me to a Presbyterian church based in the Reformed Theology just a few years ago.
My age, my long-held history in a free will Pentecostal church, and a felt need to be transparent with my family about where I am in this transition - all left me with no simple answers for my daughter.
Since entering the Presbyterian church, I have spent over three years mostly listening. It helps that Presbyterians are very intentional about their worship (nothing is done without purpose) and that we have a pastor who takes the time to explain most every aspect about our worship that may be unique.
It also helps that last year my daughter completed a somewhat grueling Communicants program in the church. It was designed to develop critical thinking and a clear understanding of the foundations of faith as this group of sixth-graders study and apply each of the 107 questions and answers of the Westminster Shorter Catechism.
I am so thankful that my daughter would ask such a question - that she is thinking along those lines; and also that her teachers care enough about her relationship with the Redeemer that they would plant it in her mind.
