The GRX Candidate

[I am feeling real sarcastic this morning so readers beware]

In viewing the field of candidates for the presidential election and in particular Barack Obama, I was thinking of great quotes of previous presidents and how he might fit into that fraternity:

Teddy Roosevelt gave us "Speak softly and carry a big stick"

From FDR we got, "We have nothing to fear but fear itself"

JFK said, "Ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country!"

.... Barack Obama challenged us with the admonition to "Check our tire pressure!" ....

Among his other soon to be quotable favorites was his statement at a fundraiser, in which he attempted to explain the bitterness of those who "cling to their guns, religion and xenophobia..."

It is that morsel of inspired rhetoric on which I would like to focus this morning.

Okay, I'm not really sure what xenophobia means - is that like - a fear of Olivia Newton-John Disco movies? Oh, you're right - that would be "Xanadu-phobia".

Anyway, I don't think Mr. Obama actually said "Xenophobia", I guess the news reporters just summarized his remarks and categorized them as xenophobia.

I think it is possible that John McCain - calculating political strategist that he is - watched the reaction to this statement and found himself a constituency!

I figure McCain's mind began clicking and he thought: "Hey, there are quite a few folks out there that are kinda' religious ...

and I know some folks that like guns ...

I don't really know what "clinging to xenophobia" is - but it's probably illegal in several states...

And hey! come to think of it - I've noticed a lot of those four-wheel drive pick up trucks with gun racks, "Honk if you love Jesus" stickers and low air pressure in their tires!

And Mr. Obama is dissing all these people -WOO! this could be BIG!"

So what did he do? He performed a major political power-play, that's what he did. He reached down among the masses and pulled out a gem of a VP candidate - a woman of the people! One that would properly represent this new found constituency.

Sarah Palin is the Guns, Religion and Xenophobia candidate -or GRX Candidate for short!

My Dad has been in the hospital this weekend awaiting heart surgery and he has conducted an extremely informal poll. With nearly every visitor that came in, he would get around to asking - "What do you think of McCain's pick for a running mate?" Most all responses that I have heard have been favorable - but my uncle from South Georgia had the best, he said: "I think she is somewhere between pretty and bad pretty!"

My uncle didn't seem very bitter but I think he does cling to religion at times. And I don't know if he owns any guns, but he has been known to fish and that's got to be just one step away from owning an assault weapon. He's probably your typical GRX constituent.

You can bet Sarah Palin owns a gun! It's not recommended that you hunt grizzly bears or moose without one. Hunting was a regular past time for her growing up in Alaska. In fact, her parents were on their way to their hunting cabin when they got the call about her big announcement last week.

She is definitely a "gun-clinger".

And that same uncle told me that he had heard that she attended the Assembly of God church... speaking as a fellow charismatic-pentecostal, I can say that that fills the bill for "religion" .

So Sarah Palin answers at least two-thirds of the GRX triangle. But if I am to uncover McCain's devious and cunning political play, I must look up xenophobia to see if Sarah is a match for that leg of the constituency group.

According to Merriam Webster's Online Dictionary, Xenophobia is fear and hatred of strangers or foreigners or of anything that is strange or foreign.

That one nearly had me stumped but then I remembered that corrupt politicians - they're strangers of sorts, are they not? I read where Sara developed a real dislike for them... maybe she's a xenophobe too!

There you have it: Sarah Palin - clinger of guns and religion and xenophobe-extraordinaire!

She's the Total GRX Package!