Monday, July 19, 2010

The Big List

I used to think that our family got a lot of things right.  Then our children began growing up.  Now I am less confident.

One of the things we did that may have proven to be "right" this summer involved a lap tray we used as a dry-erase board.  That board became "The Big List".

As the summer approached this year, we were trying to finish up a construction project on the back of our home.  The goal was to turn our screened porch into a sun-room.  You can read more about it on R.'s blog God's Design Not Mine.  The construction portion was nearing completion and that meant there was work for us to do; so we needed help or free time from the kids or something! In addition to the room, there were other projects that had gone lacking while we concentrated on the room:  things like a cluttered garage that appeared ready to spawn its own 1950's style, B-Grade science-fiction movie and the rains we had been blessed with were now resulting in some jungle-like growth in what used to be our landscaping.

With this in mind we came up with "The Big List" which was designed to give us specific "bite-sized" goals that we could accomplish as a family.  In some cases - Mom and I explained - we would need everyone participating in some fashion; in other areas, we just needed to be left alone for a time.

We set a target date and began to deliberate about how we would reward ourselves.  Each week (well almost) when we did family devotion on Sunday night, we would mark things off  "The Big List" and talk about what we might do (of course we included devotion stuff too - this is just the best time for us to have family discussions sometimes).

We decided we would do some sort of Bonus if we completed the project before our stated deadline.

As we neared the final weekend before the deadline, I took a couple days off.  We worked and I really had a lot of help from Ab and AA.  We cleaned out the garage thoroughly, Mom painted the interior of the new room, we inventoried and delivered a small truck load of stuff to the Salvation Army (freeing up -for the first time in weeks - the landing on our bonus room stairs), we performed a "cursory" cleaning of the siding on portions of the house (we deliberately put that word cursory in there so we could limit the job if necessary).

... and we finished ...

... a day early!!

Hoorah!!

It was a good feeling. Our bonus was a trip to Etowah Indian Mounds and a picnic (as you may have read about earlier here ).

I think it was a couple of weeks before we held our "official" celebration including steaks on the grill and followed by a little ceremony.



It took place in the new sun room and we took turns marking off the remaining items on "The Big List".

We never really settled on one specific event as our official reward so a week or so ago we took an evening trip to Stone Mountain for the Laser Show . . . .



. . . and again - a picnic.

There is really nothing like working together and celebrating together.  R. has always been big on setting and achieving goals  . . . I, on the other hand, have always loved the concept and the exhilaration of goal setting but was not always keen on the follow-through.  I hope this was a lesson our kids will remember about sharing in a common goal.

As I said, it may just have been one thing we got right this summer.





Thursday, July 15, 2010

New Skin!

I am taking a day off today and had a little time to spent -undistracted- with the old SoJourn blog.

So I decided -on a whim of sorts- to go with a different background.

I liked the old one because it looked old and nostalgic but the newer templates seem to better utilize the space and this one is close to my liking.

My wife over at God's Design Not Mine, changes hers each season but I thought it was good marketing to stick with my brand.

Anyway, you can share any opinions you may have. . . I can always go back ... I hope.

Thanks for the visit
-The Management

A Strange Phenomenon

This summer has been especially busy for us (keep in mind our standards are -well - different - from most folks so "busy" could mean a week with TWO items on the calendar).

Last month, one of the activities that contributed to our busy -ness  was the annual Cub Scouts Twilight Camp.  It takes place throughout one week, three hours each evening and combines scouts from all over the district.  Our church is starting a Pack and so AA and I have taken the opportunity to get back involved in Scouting after a year's hiatus.

I was privileged to get to attend all but one night and on one of the evenings toward the end of the week I witnessed an amazing phenomenon:  I saw an otherwise hyper-active group of seven and eight year old boys sitting. 

They were SITTING ... quietly, orderly ...

No scuffling. No Wrestling.  No talking.  Not even a whisper.

What had happened to bring about this singular event?  Were the Twilight Camp Water Bottles surreptitiously laced with some sort of sedatives?  Had the group leader stealthily used a knot-tying demonstration to gag and hog-tie these young Bear Scouts?

No, they were patiently waiting for their groups turn on the air-rifle range. It was a special time because after nearly a week of just target shooting - on this night they were shooting for points!
They would watch quietly - respecting the group before them and concentrating on doing their very best when their turn came.

You see each night the volunteer leaders over the air-rifle - and the archery - areas had gone to great pains to stress the strict requirements for their respective areas.

Both areas had been carefully set up with entrances, exits and intricate assembling sections all lined painfully and accurately with wooden stakes and twine. Night after night, the leaders outlined the proper safety procedures and the required behavior that would allow one to continue to have the privileged use of the range areas.  Each night the rules were observed. 

Stated expectations; reinforced consistently.

It fostered a sense of respect in the boys.

Kids are not all that different today from the kids of earlier generations - even the generations of our grandparents - they will still respond to consistent expectations - even when they are high expectations.

I saw it displayed powerfully in that momentary scene and in later scenes when that same group was celebrating their scores.  Somehow it meant more.

AA had been a little disappointed in his score (I know because he is my son and is like me in many ways) until he showed his graded target to his group leader.  The guy was full of sincere and enthusiastic praise -"Great shooting!!".  I'm pretty sure I noted a change in  AA's countenance.

On "Family Night" AA did not win the Marksmanship award but he did qualify for the Junior USA Shooting Team 2010 patch.  He -like the many other boys - earned it.

I believe boys ... and people in general ... will thrive when they find themselves in situations in which high expectations set and strict guidelines to achieve those objectives are consistently enforced.


Tuesday, July 13, 2010

...And Then There Were Five!


As you may recall, our family summer time "project" this year (and maybe beyond...) consists of a couple of goats.
Well, so far these fair beasts have been saddled with blame for a poison ivy infestation the likes of which our family has never seen and the threatened dissolution of the lifelong relationship with some nearby family members.

Ab and AA have adapted pretty well to the new found responsibility of feeding and watering the goats, however they leave the grazing part to Dad and the "keeping the pen clean" part of their responsibility lasted through one turn - I think.

Despite the woes, a fragile bridge of mutual respect was beginning to be forged and it appeared that I might get to keep the guys. . . that was before the guys started inviting their friends over...
On a recent Sunday afternoon, AA and Ab pointed out that some extra goats had joined Floyd and Thunder.  Sure enough three goats ... mostly female had sachet through the woods to their crib.

We don't live in a neighborhood but there are houses within walking distance so I inquired at one and learned that somewhere way back in the thick woods there was a pasture that was reputed to hold goats.  However, if there was a house- he did not know nor did he know the owners.

After spending the afternoon with our guys as they grazed in the woods, the trio moved on across the road to my in-law's home.  There they stayed the rest of the day and that night, congregating first in their carport and later under a patch of pines.

My mother-in-law called 9-11. 

I guess that was merited because for a time they were standing in the middle of the road and stopping traffic.

Our friends in blue did some checking but did not locate the home of these "3 Nanny Goats Gruff". 

Meanwhile at our house the discussion came up about just keeping the new goats and starting a herd. . .





.... that was the response I got.

The following day was the Monday after Independence Day so Grandmother and Papa set out to find the owners of the goats.  They were inspired in part by the fact that the goats had developed a taste for Grandmother's flowers.

With bloodhound-like instincts they eventually tracked down the owners who came that night and captured (with lasso's) two of the goats.  The third came back to my house.

Roberto - the owner - was tired of trying to hem in the fugative goat and didn't want to take the chase to my house.  So he made me a fine offer: 

"you have two goats?"  ...I nodded.

"you want three goats?!" - I hesitated ...

"you can have her!"

- I think my life -including my 21 years of wedded bliss - passed before my eyes.

I declined.

The white goat with black spots or "Calico" as I dubbed her, stayed with us for the better part of a week, grazing with my goats and then running around the outside of Floyd and Thunder's pen when I put them up for the night.

I noticed that my two began to act a little more aggressive with each other as they began to notice that their new found friend was a lady.  Calico began to warm to me a little, edging a little closer from time to time.
She didn't know that my plan was to catch her and then give her rightful owner, Roberto a call.

On the last night she was with us, she came very near the open gate where I was standing.  The boys were oblivious since they were occupied with the sweet meal I had just put out.

One of the guys - Floyd I think - rammed the other and that scared her back to her place behind the pen.

The next morning she was gone.  We haven't seen her since.

Perhaps she found her way back home through the thick woods.

But even now, if you look closely you can see in Floyd's eyes a certain far away look ... thinking maybe upon what could have been.

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Independence Celebration July 2010

Our 4th of July Weekend was lots of fun! A parade and then a quick stop by my office to cool off; a family gathering with my folks; and parked at the local stadium and awaited the fireworks!
Thank God for America!

Disappointed with People

Solomon - the wisest man ever - is troubling to me.  I think it is because his story doesn't end well.  He disappoints me.

I Kings 11 tells the story of this great king's downfall.  After leading Israel into a renaissance of sorts, he got distracted.  His distraction?  Women.

Well actually, his attraction to exotic women was only the beginning of his trail toward confusion.  Solomon is reputed to have had one thousand wives and concubines ("concubines" is Bible for folks cohabiting without the benefit of marriage). 
Maybe its because I'm getting older -but that just doesn't sound nearly as appealing as it once did.  He would have to be the smartest guy alive just to keep up with the anniversaries!  He would need an entire clerical staff just to keep up with all the stuff he needed to pick up on the way home from the office each day!
No thank you!  As for me, I'm just barely wise enough to keep up with one wife - and it is debatable as to whether my intelligence will even handle that.

Anyway, the problem was that many or most of these women were foreign and brought their idol worshipping cultures with them.  In typical intellectual elitist style - Solomon was "open" and "tolerant" of their heathen practices.

What we call "God's Judgement" sometimes is just the natural outcome of practices that run counter to His will, and thus Solomon met with God's judgement.  The price:  David's dynastic heritage would be all but decimated under the watch of the first heir to his throne.  Solomon would waste away God's promise in just one administration.

In the beginning, humans moved pretty quickly to mortgage away God's promise of life everlasting by their almost immediate decline into sin; in the same way, the promise of a strong Israeli kingdom under the rule of David's descendants was quickly frittered away.

Enemies on the Horizon
The trigger point for the fall of the kingdom began with three pesky adversaries that began to show up on Solomon's radar screen.  Unlike his father, Solomon had enjoyed a very peaceful rule up until that point.
These three came from different geographical points and different persuasions.  I want to talk about one of them because, like Solomon, he too presents a case for disappointment.

Jeroboam was a stalwart in Solomon's force; he was a "mighty man of valor"- a very elite group of warriors.  I find some common ground with him in that it appears that -like me- he was in Human Resources.  That's right, he was over Solomon's labor force.  While reading earlier passages regarding Solomon's kingdom recently, I was surprised to note that when constructing the magnificent temple, Solomon had people that were over his "labor force".  Jeroboam was one of those guys.

The Promise of a Bright Future
One day an old prophet approached Jeroboam and presented an illustrated sermon in the form of a brand new sport jacket which he promptly ripped into a dozen pieces.  The old man then handed ten of those fragments to Jeroboam and pronounced that God would rip the kingdom of Israel from Solomon's heir in like manner and 10 of the families of Israel would come under Jeroboam's rule.

How do you like that?  From war hero to HR Guy to King... what a shrewd career move. Actually, it wasn't Jeroboam's strategy at all; the whole plan was God's.  The prophet the told him that God was promising him a strong kingdom for himself and his family after him - a legacy like the one promised to David - if only he would stay true to God.

Some time later Solomon died and his son, Rehoboam ascended to the throne. When his constituents  pledged their undying devotion if he would only lighten up and go a little easier than his father did, Rehoboam took it on advisement and counseled with his cabinet.

Rehoboam listened to the advice of the scholarly old sages that had advised his father and he listened to the advice of his buddies that he hung out with at the malt shop.  Then he took the advice of his youthful counselors and dealt harshly with the people, pledging to be even more burdensome than his father.

Just like that the kingdom split and ten clans brought themselves under the rule of Jeroboam.  Just as God had said . . . . and further proving His Word, God established Jeroboam's kingdom over Israel.

This is where the disappointment comes in.

Choosing the Wrong Path
Having arrived at the pinnacle of success through no strength of his own, Jeroboam promptly began to try and maintain his status through his own wisdom and he completely left God out of the equation.

You see, Jeroboam ruled over ten tribes but Judah - one of the tribes that did not join him in his rebellion - was the one in which Jerusalem was located.

Jerusalem, the heart of Israel's worship.  Israelites would not stop traveling there for worship - his own people would go there often to worship.

So, being afraid that he would lose the hearts of these pious people when they returned to Jerusalem, Jeroboam established his own centers of worship among his clans - two of them - and set up worship to a golden calf. 

He quickly forgot how he got to where he was and Who brought him there.
This rapid scuttling of one's devotion to God disappoints me.  This failure to hold a very basic understanding of God's work and how His way always is best - astonishes me.

Jeroboam would go on to make idol worship prominent in Israel and even to transform that once godly nation. 

He would have a legacy - but not the one God offered - instead he would often be called the one "that caused Israel to sin".  According to Dake's Commentary, he would be referred to in this light 23 times.

Does it Really Matter?
Jeroboam's story took place thousands of years ago - many years before Christ - what does it matter?

Though we now enjoy a freedom and redemption through Christ that wasn't available to Jeroboam, I think basic human nature hasn't changed.
And often the things that most disappoint us about others are the very things that we most dislike about ourselves.
I'm disappointed because I am like Jeroboam in that despite the blessings God has given me, I will sometimes allow fear to turn my attention from Him and focus instead on trying to fix things myself.

Inevitably this path leads me to the wrong answers.

Secondly, R. and I went through a couple's bible study group called Married for Life a number of years ago and one of the lessons dealt with forgiveness.  The study suggested that when looking at areas of unforgiveness in  a marriage, it helps to think of areas in which your spouse has "disappointed" you. 

Even though Jeroboam ignored the path to God's blessings - it was the natural thing to do.  When people around me do likewise and disappoint me, I need to look to God again for strength - this time to forgive; an act that can feel very unnatural at times.

People will disappoint us.... often just because they are people.  Parents . . . teachers . . . brothers and sisters . . .  friends . . . pastors . . . even spouses.

People will disappoint us and sometimes our biggest disappointment may be the guy or gal in the mirror.
That path leads to trouble - no doubt - but God, Who is rich in mercy, has provided the exit ramp of forgiveness that leads back to the path of His blessings.

Sunday, July 4, 2010

Liberty Too Precious to be Buried in Books

It has been said that we are a country that is built on an idea, governed by the people, and the authority of this government is based on paper.

The Declaration of Independence was the foundational statement of that idea.

Men believed it so strongly that they staked their lives, their fortunes, their sacred honor to it.  Liberty was nearly in their grasp and they felt it was worth any sacrifice.

We who have enjoyed liberty for so long - and without a lot of personal sacrifice - might tend to place too little value on it.

Hollywood director, Frank Capra from film's Golden Age -knew how to illustrate liberty's passion and
there was no better actor to follow Capra's direction than Jimmy Stewart.

I hope you will watch at least a couple of minutes of this near 10 minute clip.  Pay close attention and listen for this quote at the very beginning:

 "Liberty is too precious a thing to be buried in books. . . . Men should hold it up in front of them every single day of their lives and say, 'I'm free to think and to speak. My ancestors couldn't. I can. And my children will"






Today - let's hold liberty before our faces and before the faces of our children.